The Californian Garmo Lives Life

My Life as a gay Armenian-American living in California.

The Breakup October 9, 2008

Filed under: Life — thecaligarmo @ 11:22 pm
Tags: , , , , ,

So I guess I knew this day was coming. Sadly, I knew it was coming for a week now and was trying not to think about it, but tis life. Yours truly is officially single once again. The reason for this one was the distance. Long distance was more than the other side could handle, which is a good enough excuse. It’s just started to make me wonder.

This is another relationship that I get to add to my countless ones that haven’t worked out. And just like all of those this one lasted a short time. This is the longest relationship I have had with a guy, 2.25 months. The second longest? 2 months, the 3rd longest? 1 week. I’m starting to think there may be something completely wrong with me. Why can I not get into a relationship and actually have it last longer than a week, or even 2 months? Am I doing something completely and horribly wrong? Sometimes I wonder if it’s because I’m ‘unattractive’ or maybe I don’t have a good personality. It’s times like these when self doubt is strongest. I just want to know why I can’t keep a relationship.

Funny part is, I can keep them with woman just fine, sort of. Out of the three relationships I had with girls one there lengths were 6 months, 1 month, 1 week. Again, not a very long amount of time for a straight relationship. And oddly, the 6 month relationship was long distance too (all the way in montana!).

So I don’t know anymore. If there is some fatal flaw in me that turns all of the guys away from me can someone please tell me so I can change? I’m sort of sick of the whole short term relationship thing. I want something that will last.

Emotionally,
-The Cali Garmo

 

4 Responses to “The Breakup”

  1. artmika Says:

    I understand you perfectly. You described something very familiar to what one feels when relationship breaks. We all try to figure out what went wrong. But when there is long distance involved, that’s usually it. Based on my personal experience too, long distance relationship almost never works. Sad, but true… Do not feel too down. You’ll meet someone special again… soon.

  2. krystalmage Says:

    You know, whenever a relationship ends, its natural to try and blame yourself first. But if you keep turning against yourself, it will be hard for you to move forward. Heres the thing – try cutting yourself some slack. And it will work out.

    • thecaligarmo Says:

      After cutting myself some slack it has been a lot easier. It’s easy to blame yourself in the beginning, the hard part is learning when to let go. And like you said, it will all work out.

  3. krystalmage Says:

    That’s wonderful! Time takes care of a lot of things. I only wish it would work faster 🙂


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